My Story

The Healthy Mom Coach

Health and wellness have always been a priority in my life. I’ve consistently exercised, eaten well, and even majored in Nutrition in college. My relationship with alcohol, however, was the one area that held me back from complete wellness.

In my high school and college days, I used alcohol as a way of feeling comfortable socially. I had always been an introvert, somewhat shy and awkward in social situations. I believed alcohol helped me relax and loosen up. I was a weekend binge drinker who could never indulge in just one or two drinks. Being young and social, my drinking habits seemed fairly typical. Excessive drinking, particularly in college, was the norm. I joined a sorority and the partying would last for days. I became conditioned to the heavy weekend drinking routine I had developed over the four years while living on campus. I never questioned my behavior because I thought, “Isn’t this what you’re supposed to do in college?”

My Story

The Healthy Mom Coach

Health and wellness have always been a priority in my life. I’ve consistently exercised, eaten well, and even majored in Nutrition in college. My relationship with alcohol, however, was the one area that held me back from complete wellness.

In my high school and college days, I used alcohol as a way of feeling comfortable socially. I had always been an introvert, somewhat shy and awkward in social situations. I believed alcohol helped me relax and loosen up. I was a weekend binge drinker who could never indulge in just one or two drinks. Being young and social, my drinking habits seemed fairly typical. Excessive drinking, particularly in college, was the norm. I joined a sorority and the partying would last for days. I became conditioned to the heavy weekend drinking routine I had developed over the four years while living on campus. I never questioned my behavior because I thought, “Isn’t this what you’re supposed to do in college?”

After college, I continued my weekend binge drinking activities. I knew the amount of alcohol I was consuming could not be good for me, but I was still intensely drawn to this routine. I made deals with myself. I did my best not to drink Monday – Thursday, figuring if I was alcohol-free for four days straight, it wasn’t that bad. I was hopeful that eating well and exercising would help counteract any possible negative effects alcohol was having on my body.

Fast forward to my early 30s when my husband and I tried having children. We struggled with fertility issues, and after a battery of tests were categorized as “unexplained infertility, ” finding no definitive diagnosis. We started infertility treatments, and happily ended up having twin sons in 2006. To this day, I still wonder if my excessive binge drinking contributed to our infertility.

After my boys were born, I officially became a stay-at-home mom. I suffered from postpartum depression, and the drinking started up again. The stress of being a first-time mother of not only one, but two babies set in, and my drinking escalated quickly.

We welcomed another son three years later, and while I constantly reminded myself about how a “responsible mother” should behave, my weekend binge drinking continued. Over the years I read various books such as 7 Ways to Safe Social Drinking, Mommy Doesn’t Drink Anymore, and The Easy Way to Stop Drinking. I felt the books gave me some hope, but once I became a mother, the guilt surrounding drinking had new meaning. I also realized that while motherhood was a blessing, I also felt trapped.

When my boys were little, I tried to set limits and moderate my drinking, but every day was a struggle. It consumed so much of my thoughts, even on the days I was not drinking! At this stage, I was not overly concerned about my behavior because I figured they were not yet old enough to notice a difference.

As the years went on, alcohol continued to be a major part of my lifestyle. My favorite “hobby” was to go out to bars with my girlfriends. I became known for making the best margaritas. It was such an integral part of my social life, and never in a million years could I imagine not drinking alcohol!

When my boys got older, things started to shift for me. I started to worry if my boys were going to notice I was drinking too much or if I was being a good role model. With all the daily stress of motherhood, I still loved the euphoric feeling drinking provided. It was an escape.

I questioned whether or not a few hours of drinking were worth the guilt and mental and physical suffering that came after. As I got older, recovering from drinking became noticeably more difficult. I had such cognitive dissonance over the situation, knowing the amount of alcohol I was drinking was not healthy for me, but still doing it. I had this mental stress battle in my mind since my early years of drinking, and it was not letting up.

Lifelong battles come to a breaking point.

Since I was a teenager, I dealt with chronic insomnia, depression and anxiety. I started to wonder if drinking was connected to all three. Plus, drinking while taking an antidepressant did not seem like sustainable behavior, and I found it wasn’t really helping my mood.

I felt exhausted all of the time, needing to take a “nap” every afternoon, even on the days I did not drink the night before. Just the thought of alcohol had me stressed out and anxious.

I spent the next few years trying to gain control. At one point, I was successful at living alcohol-free for seven months, but I soon found myself depressed, lonely, and isolated.

Alcohol was such a part of my social life, and I often felt like an outsider with friends because I was not drinking. I would eventually find myself back to dabbling and drinking occasionally, which then brought me right back to where I had started.

Unfortunately, the binge drinking was starting to take a toll on my well-being, physically and mentally.

I would black out and not remember conversations with my husband and friends the night before. I would wake up embarrassed not knowing what I said to anyone. I was tired of hating and disrespecting myself, living every day with the feeling of a pit in my stomach, and feeling like I was constantly disappointing my loved ones.

I could not let my boys continue to see me behaving this way, treating my body like it was a piece of garbage. I was so disgusted with myself, and was so worried about the image I was painting for their future relationship with alcohol. Children do what parents do, not what they say, and I did not want them heading down this same path.

I was also becoming extremely worried about my long-term health, hearing more about women in their 40s being diagnosed with breast cancer, including some of my close friends. Knowing alcohol has a link to breast cancer, I worried about my life and future health if I continued drinking like I was.

Making myself a priority.

Fortunately, there was no rock bottom or dramatic story that finally did it for me. It was instead a realization that was a long time coming, and I am so grateful that it eventually did.

I knew I had to start making better choices for ME. I could not achieve complete well-being continuing on the path I was on.

I woke up on September 4, 2018 and told myself I was done, the party was over. To support my journey, I found Annie Grace’s book, This Naked Mind, and also did her free 30 Day Alcohol Experiment and 100 Days of Lasting Change. Unlike previous attempts, I took a deep dive into educating myself about my relationship with alcohol, and the impact it had on my behavior for so many years. Once I did, it felt like my mind was free of all the static that was constantly in my head for so long. I was so excited about my “new” life and felt truly blessed that alcohol had finally become irrelevant in my life. An amazing mindset shift had occurred for me!

It was liberating and life changing!

It has been over 2 years since I’ve been alcohol-free. In this time, I have found confidence, love, respect, and compassion for MYSELF, all of which had always been very unfamiliar to me.

My depression and anxiety have fizzled, and I no longer need to take an antidepressant. It is wonderful to wake up every morning with a clear head, free of guilt. My sleep has drastically improved, and my overall motivation and quality of life continue to advance.

I made a conscious decision and commitment to myself to be the mother I have always wanted to be, and I am so proud of the example I’m setting for my children. My boys are growing up SO fast, and I know that I am fully present and a positive role model for them.

My mind and body are free, and I’m right where I want to be. I have never felt more healthy, and look forward to a bright future full of good health and joy, and supporting other moms on their journey to good health and wellness. I finally have complete freedom and control in my life!

Now, as a Health & Wellness Coach, I’m committed to supporting moms and helping them make lifestyle changes so that they too can lead healthier and happier lives.

My Credentials:

  • Functional Medicine Certified Health Coach (Candidate) March 2021
  • This Naked Mind Certified Coach 2020
  • MS Health & Wellness 2019
  • MS Holistic Nutrition 2019
  • Certified Power Yoga Instructor 2019

Connect with me today…

To discuss what is possible for your health and well-being!